My mother had tickets to see The Lord of the Dance. I know. She had planned to take the girls but The Teenager (who will now be known as Maya as that is probably her name) had to tidy towels in a department store for minimum wage. So I went in her place. Well, you can't waste a ticket, can you. Not at 33 pounds a pop. Yes 3 3. In a regional, small town theatre.
The Younger One (who remains 'The Younger One' for now) was looking forward to it. She likes a bit of Irish jigging. My mother loves it. I was in two minds because as far as dancing goes, Strictly (Come Dancing) serves my dancerly needs on a Saturday evening perfectly. But as I said - 33 pounds and all that. Besides, it meant leaving the house after dark in a clean shirt and in my world, that's rare.
Our tickets were row C, but the front two rows had mysteriously disappeared, so we were front row. Uncomfortably close. 'We won't be able to see their clogs' said my mother. You can glean from this that we are not au fait with the terminology of Irish dance. I was worried. If a dancer lost a clog, we were done for.
The lights dimmed. There was an almighty explosion. Had something malfunctioned? A bomb? Could Michael Flatley's jiggers really be a terrorist target?
'Should we evacuate'? yelled my mother over the booming Irish music.
'I think I already have' said the elderly woman in the next seat.
The dancers flew onto stage, all sequins, flailing legs and bouncing curls. And that was just the men.
Truth was, they were really quite incredible. Just when you thought they couldn't dance any faster, they cranked it up another notch, umpteen synchronized pairs of legs doing impossible things. Ramrod straight backs. It was quite the spectacle.
Whilst we couldn't see their feet, we were close enough to see that after almost two hours of strenuous dancing, they were barely out of puff. And there was another advantage in being so close. The lead male dancer would catch my mother's eye, smile and wink. She adored that. In fact the look on her face was worth missing Strictly for. Clapping for an encore she even shouted 'More'. Just the once.
And I bet - bet the ticket price itself, that everyone in that audience, once they'd got home, with the explosions and Irish music still ringing in their ears, had a little go at doing an Irish dance. Bet you.
Not that I did of course.
37 comments:
It's certainly an impressive style of dancing, but I always feel the need to shout (at the TV) 'loosen up a bit' so I don't think I've quite got the point.
I really must stop reading blogs in Starbucks. Spluttering my coffee and laughing at your 'evacuation' got me a lot of looks! Glad you had fun, and I don't believe for a second you haven't been jigging around the kitchen :-)
Oh no, the deedly dee music has now infected my head - how did you manage that across the internet!
Oh, that was SO funny! I have laughed and laughed - I must tell my girlies to come and read this.
(So glad a flying clog didn't do for you)
Oh God, Lane, that made me laugh - I've always had a dark urge to see a bit of the Riverdance myself But after reading this I think I want to take your mum with me! I think I'd probably embarass myself with trying to get up and having a go with them.
Sounds brill, Lane!
It sounds like you all had a brilliant time. We had either the same or something similar over here and they were amazing. I was exhausted just watching them all.
I'm sure they'll have Irish dancing on the wee thingy soon. We'll have to save up and buy it. Who knows we could join them on stage if we fail as writers.
My niece used to riverdance and was very good at it, then she became a teenager and got all embarrassed.
Not sure I'd have missed Strictly for it, but it sounds like a good time was had by all - especially your Mum!
I may be one of the only people who react this way, but whenever I watch the "Lord of the Dance" video or it comes on television, I cry.
It's like there's too much joy and awe and it just bubbles up and overflows and has noplace else to go except out my eyeballs.
I also cried when I saw Tori Amos perform live in concert, and I cried through an entire Josh Groban concert, which was the most amazing live musical event I have ever been to.
Beauty does that to me, I guess.
I can't imagine having that kind of energy. Truly. I don't know if I ever did in my whole life.
Of course being a size -2 might help with it all but I'd have to give up peanut butter and I'm not going to.
Oh I've missed your writing - when this book of yours is published you've got one guaranteed sale anyway.
I know what you mean about it being a rare occurrence going out at night a bit 'done up'. I think it sounds a splendid evening and SCD wasn't so great that night anyway
This story had me in stitches from beginning to end, Lane! So much so that Felix is now curious why I'm laughing so loudly so late in the evening and he'll be coming by soon.
It was definitely an experience you had there! I'm with aims, can't believe anyone can have that much energy.
oh come on,Lane a little jig won't hurt.
and Mark Knopfler with "4 in a row" on "a shot at glory" should really get you going.Babaloo says it good for doing household scores,too
Bet you did! Sounds fab - hilarious post, as always, Lane! x
So glad a low-flying clog didn't do for you, Lane! Brilliantly written - you've livened up my evening. I once went to see 'A Midsummer Night's Dream' with two dear friends, one of whom has, shall we say, a very strident laugh. We ended up in the front row, which is really too close. My friend's howls of laughter attracted the attention of the actor playing Puck, who took to coming to the edge of the stage and fixing P. with a quizzical stare, which made his laughter all the more helplessly loud. Result? Entire theatre's focus on us. Myself and K. (see how I'm protecting their dignity with initials?) leaning away from P., pretending we have nothing to do with him. :)
What a fab post :)
I foresee Bob Dylan being forsaken for a life of diddly-diddly-dee and some nifty footwork in the dark. It's ok, your secret's safe with us.
Ha, ha. So funny, Lane.
And leaving the house after dark in a clean shirt - Yikes, I've forgotten what that's like!
This post made m laugh. I am quite impressed with those dancers though. Imagine having that kind of stamina? Why I might even get the ironing done at the end of a long day. On second thought perhaps not.
Ooh, I bet you did. I will be asking Peggy and Teas. They will tell me the truth x
A bit of a surprise with Row C being at the front. They must have extended the stage by taking out two rows of seats. Good job you weren't watching a comedian - they pick on front row people! Sounds like a great evening, not my cup of tea but Mrs Troy and the M-I-L love Riverdance. I prefer the footwork at ITFC.
JJ - I can understand that!
Denise - And I've still got the image of those big new tables in Starbucks. Did you ever take your cushion?:-)
ChrisH - I'm pretty glad those clogs were strapped on too:-)
Debs R - It's just so infectious isn't it:-)
Nik - T'was Nik.
Debs - They are incredible fit. They're also incredibly young:-)
Fia - Fail? I will not have that word -d'you hear.
(but yes we could:-)
Karen - she loved it. But then she loves musicals...
Marcheline - I can understand that. I think too, because their skill shows the love, joy and hard work they've put into it. And they're sharing it.
Aims -I'm not giving up my p butter either. Oh no:-)
French Fancy - I don't think SCD has been all that great this year at all. It's lost something - like interesting 'celebrities'.
(and thank you too)
Babaloo - their energy is amazing. I worry tfor their poor knees though!
Felix - I'd do myself an injury. However 4 in a row is irresistible. Thank you!
Amanda - thank you m'dear.
Lorna - It's very weird being so close and being 'seen'. P sounds a dear, but maybe not a front row buddy:-)
Spiral - Are you sure you won't tell. Honest? Phew.
Shirley - Glad I'm not the only semi-hermit:-)
DJ Kirby - Ironing? Now that takes real stamina!
Helen - They will. They're easily bribed:-)
Troy -!Yes, I think they'd made the stage bigger - and probably reinforced it with the battering it took.
The thought of being picked out by a comedian makes me shudder!
Lovely post. Wish I was Irish. Then my mam would have made me do Irish dancing and I'd have got fit and I wouldn't be 3 stone overweight like I am now.
I saw Riverdance for the first time on public television during fund drive week and did it whip up this Irish blood. Then the troupe came to Louisville. How thrilling when they practically fly through the air and on-stage. Love the long whirling lines when you think if anyone breaks off they'll land in the balcony. In our Kentucky mountains clogging is quite popular because most of us have some Irish blood.
I'm glad you took the plunge and put on a clean shirt for the cause on Saturday night, Lane. We hermits have to be careful about always turning down social occasions in favor of teevee. Did Pegs quiz you on how the dancers looked when you got home?
Great but you've lost me (senility) Where did this event take place.£33 sounds a lot but I don't get out much!!
Great but you've lost me (senility) Where did this event take place.£33 sounds a lot but I don't get out much!!
Still laughing at the evacuation!
And £33 is cheap for riverdance type stuff - Ya wouldn't get front row seats in London for that!
Great writing Lane. So funny.
Hilarious! My nieces do a great Riverdance and look like they're having a fit as they flail and clomp their way around my Mum's kitchen to "that Irishy music".
The poor daughter's loss was her mother's gain!
LOL!!!
I've been farting around for ten minutes now trying to figure out how to write a blog comment from within this Rss reader thingie, and I'm still laughing. You, your Mom, and the evacuating lady sitting next to you, crack me up!
SMMMMMOOOOOCH! :) thank you.
Soiunds fab - and that music is so catchy!
Oh my Lane, that post didn't half make me laugh!! I'm afraid that I am with JJ thought...I end up just willing them to move their arms a bit...just a teeny weeny bit?
C x
oh, your mother got her money's worth, i'd say.
i read about irish dancing some time back and ther's a reason they don't move their arms but now i can't remember what it was. something about you evil brits, i suspect. everything they do is because of you, isn't it?
seriously, my memory recalls something about dancing on a board and ... oh crap. the sequins and acrylic curls, though, are a new touch. they didn't have those in those old bumpy cottages, i'm quite sure.
ah there we go---the evil brits AND the priests. of course.
irish dancers don't move their upper bodies when they dance because priests thought it was too dangerously sensuous. and because the brits outlawed traditional irish dancing (along with everything else irish) so dancing without moving the upper body was more discreet.
Jenny Woolf - I wish my mother had too. Might have given me some grace:-)
Faye - It's incredible how popular Irish dancing is worldwide isn't it. Michael Flately alone has several troupe touring the world at the moment.
(and yes Peggy was very interested in what we ate in the interval:-)
Grumpy Old Ken - It's sounds alot to me too! It was the at the town theatre.
Fionnuala - I know! The price down there scare me.
cait - thank you :-)
CC Devine - ha! I can just imagine:-)
Dar - Can you leave a message in a feed? I had no idea.
(and thanks:-)
Flowerpot - isn't it just:-)
Carol - I tell you, they're like wood. Nothing even ... er bounces:-)
Laurie - hey that's interesting. Evil Brits and priests have ALOT to answer for. And I love the way the Irish found a way round the bans.
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