And so I ....
- Arm myself with plate of thickly Marmited toast and tea and open current Novel.doc.
- Stare at doc.
- Open Children's Story.doc.
- Stare at doc.
- Have quick game of Scramble to wake up mind.
- Write 150 words.
- Have quick game of Scramble as reward.
- Delete 100 words.
- Go to find Rocky Bar as consolation.
- Write another 200 words.
- Have quick game of Scramble as reward.
- And a banana.
- And another cup of tea and three Malted Milks.
- Spot several emails winking at bottom of screen and go to investigate.
- Decide email from long lost friend has to be answered immediately and regale them with story of my life story 1998 -2008.
- Have ham and mustard sandwich to keep up strength after extensive email writing. And coffee.
- Have quick game of Scramble to work off sandwich.
- Try to decide on ending for children's story and sit and stare at gentle rain for 30 mins.
- Have quick game of Scramble to kick start mind.
- Write 300 words.
- Go to Novel.doc and scroll back and forth until scrolling finger is noticeably shorter.
- Realize in a time-line of one year, the main character who is neither Muslim, Jewish or anything else, does not have a Christmas. Or a birthday. Decide to repair this but first ...
- Go to get yoghurt to replenish calcium in scrolling finger.
- Whilst there start to make the dinner and get creative adding the contents of fridge to casserole and fiddle about with my dumplings. Make cuppa.
- Write 300 words.
- Do not delete any.
- Have game of Scramble as reward.
- Have quick whip round house with hoover but get waylaid by The Teenager's make up bag and have rummage hoping to find something new which will transform face into that of dewy young person. Try on glittery eye pencil and am shocked at the result. As if I have been exhumed. Last month.
- Am astounded at the time.
- Get stuck in.
- Time up.
- And I was doing so well.
- (Am thinking of inventing a velcroed writer's chair. Would come complete with velcro body suit with built in Rocky Bars).
And in other news, here's a special Dummy award from Dumdad.He lives in Paris so he's not so dumb.
The award was for getting the answer to a question wrong. I love it when that happens.
54 comments:
You had me in stitches with this post!
Certainly a very productive day. And your Scramble IQ is probably up a few points... :)
Noooooooo! We are twins separated at birth! Please, please invent that velcro-writer's chair NOW! (Ps so relieved that it isn't just me.)
That sounded like such a lovely day, well spent (if we overlook the whole Marmite thing).
I'm at home today, writing a report. I wonder what game I'll play to reward myself for opening my work's email? Better have a snack now to think about that...
PS: For HullaEmails and things, {{{{{Lane}}}}}
Do you know that is me too? Only I've saved time by having my snacks on the desk with me. Climbing up and down those stairs with a huge belly just tires me out and stops me playing on facebook!
You are brilliant! I don't dare investigate Scramble, it sounds terrifying addictive and I'm bad enough with Spider Solitaire...
Please make that velcro chair invention a priority. After a quick coffee and game of Scramble, of course.
I read Scramble all the way through as Scrabble until I read Lucy Diamond's comment and thought she's got it wrong. No, it was me. What's Scramble? Like Lucy, I'm addicted to Spider Solitaire and Solitaire to fill in the gaps....
Oh dear, you've got me snortling at work again... I do believe the velcro'd chair is something that we simpl kust have. I envisage the choccy bar to be holster-like, the bullets which we will fire at lassitude.
Scrambled brains are not recommended, but might be good on toast if you run out of Marmite?
Babaloo - I'm up to 144. I will never, ever, ever reach your freakishly high score!:-)
Chrish - I will get onto it. Just as soon as I've finished my Breakaway. And answered comments of course:-)
McBobo - 'The Marmite thing' strengthens the blood I'll have you know. All the more energy for online games and multi snack breaks:-)
PS -Thanks you. S'what friends are for.
Helen - Can you still sit at your desk? you deserve all the snacks (and FacebooK) necessary whilst carrying babba:-)
Lucy - Do not go near Scramble. Order. It is the devil's wordy person's work. It is to me anyway.
Now would you like your Velcro suit in Summer Yellow or Winter Berry? Maybe we could have different colours for different genres?
Dumdad - Scramble is like Boggle. Making words on a grid. A game is 3 minutes. I would imagine Scrabble would be seriously longer! Daren't even look up Spider Solitaire:-)
Spiral - A holster! I like that. We could sit velcroed like writerly Lara Crofts. Mind you, I would rather eat the ammo than fire it:-)
That's funny, I read scrabble all the way through too!
That post really made me smile, especially as I am still feeling pants and can't go out for another week, eek. I think I realise the pull of 'blog friends' now! I am so bored but at least the word count is going up! x
Lol! Sounds like you've been most industrious - if we discount the writing part. And horribly familiar. I'm getting a lot of housework done now that I've got more writing time on my hands.
Actually we've got mice at the moment (which wouldn't be at all tasty spread on toast) so I'm a woman on a mission. What I need is a velcro mousetrap, because the little buggers keep escaping :o)
What's all this about a children's story?? Sounds like you've gone multi-talented to me.
Lane, I think you must have been an inventor in a previous life. First there was the T-Pod and now the velcro chair.
Or maybe your children's novel has an inventor as the main character?
Lane, I may laugh at this brilliant post about the ability of writers NOT to write, but laughter is close to tears ... I only ever find hoovering or ironing attractive when I have writing to do. As for dangerous blogs like yours, which I just HAVE to check up on and then click a link from and another link etc etc etc ... Get that velcro chair sorted now! Only I want little rucksacks of Lindors attached, aythankyoo. Lorna :-) aka Mistress of Displacement Activity (Honours, First Class)
the problem was you had too much time - get the egg timer girl!!!!! Twenty minutes only to write, then see what happens :-)
I had to come and see your blog, seeing as you won a dummy, you lucky girl. I had to laugh at the constant snacking to keep up strength - we are snacky twins - I prefer to snack than to eat proper meals.
I too daren't try Scramble as I'll get obsessed. Have you ever tried Chuzzle?
That had me laughing so loud that my daughter came to investigate. I too am a Queen of procrastination....found out that I had five years of phone bills in a file today so I proceeded to shred them rather than open current novel.doc. x
L=Plate - blog friends rock:-) Hope you get loads done in your time off and feel better soon:-)
Karen - Velcro mousetrap? Now there an idea....:-)
Children's story has been on the go for a long time. A shamefully long time:-(
Pat P - Ha! Might just jack in the writing and become a fully time snack eating inventor of daft gadgets:-)
lorna - I'm loving the little rucksacks of Lindors attached. Will add that to specifications and patent:-) I'm promoting you to an MA, no Phd, of Displacement Activiites for such an idea:-)
Liz - Ah such sense. I will wind up my Yellow Pepper Timer and do just that. May I snack at the same time?:-)
French Fancy - Hi there snacky twin. I'm right proud of that Dummy:-)
'Chuzzle'? I daren't. Oh no:-)
fionnuala - lol. But shredding is so theraputic. I hope you were dreaming up story ideas whilst you wee shredding. You were weren't you?:-)
Thank you Lane. I needed this!
You have left me exhausted! (I am so pleased to find someone else is as good at prevaricating as moi - though I have yet to employ the Scrabble ruse.)
Lol ... sound like procrastination is the thief of rocky bars....
LOL, brilliant. I have so many days like that.
Just popped back to thank you for your advice - much appreciated. Will try that, the velcro chair and the egg-timer (Liz's idea!)... I think I need a Blog Blocker too - something that pops up and covers my eyes when a juicy blog appears before me... can you work on that?
Yer a nutter - this was very very funny. If you are going to distract yourself, just sit back, close your eyes and visualize your walking up to the stage to rounds of huge applause as you get ready to thank everyone for your Booker prize on 2009! Keep doing it - it will spur you on.
Eating chocolate, playing Scrabble, but no blogging - methinks you are slipping woman TFX
I need to
-delete spider solitaire (I have actually done this before. minesweeper too. it's amazing how much work I can avoid with such short and simple games)
-unplug my modem
-not notice any housework
before i can ever get anything done. Glad it's not just me :o)
I love super productive days like that. You learn so much about yourself and your inner workings and your appetite. And you see that you are a multitasker, that's very important.
Congratulations on your Dummy award. Getting it from Dumdad is alway s very special. I've got one too and I treasure it.
Now me being a Council nutter ... er worker ... has learned a little known law of nature called 'Parkinson's law' which basically states that 'a task expands to fill the time allotted to it'. I think Parkinson most definitely a writer, don't you?
The velcro seat sounds good.
Until just over a year ago I ran a magazine and I had some days when I just could not settle down to work properly, even when there was loads of urgent stuff to do. I used to tell people I needed to staple myself to my chair (so I can relate to the velcro comment - although velcro would be far too easy to escape from).
I can tell you exactly where you went wrong. Never start a day with marmite. In fact never do anything with marmite. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about xxxxxxxxxx
This post made me roar with laughter!! I procrastinate when I've got something to do....suddenly everything I've been putting off for months becomes really important and must be done that instant!!!
Congratulations on your award!!
C x
LOL! But I'm still impressed; you actually got lots of writing done!
Hi Lane,
I think it is time for you to try the local library for a place to write...I know when I am home I end up doing everything but study!!! ha! Like today! I am home-but I will have to get out of here or I'll end up eating the contents of the fridge, all the chocolate D thinks he has hidden good and well (ha) and slurping tea while reading one of my favourite blogs (yes Lane YOURS!!)...anyway it will please you to know that I have put out that blog of mine a bundle of unfinished posts...any particular post you think I should complete, I'll be open to suggestions...
This was a long post!
Have a lovely day!
aminahx
LMAO! Are we twins perhaps or is this just what writers do. I swear, Scramble should be banned, so should all the contents of the fridge and the kitchen cupboard. My excuse for today is a good one though, I can't write because there is too much peeping going on in my sun-room and it's doing my head in!
a hectic day Lane - you must be shattered by now!
my life, too, only without even having progressed as far as novel.com or childrens.com, stuck at notebooks and window gazing and commenting and drifting in and out of hte BBC website. THANK GOD I ahve no idea what scramble is though have a sad feeling I'm about to google it.
I love how you portion out your time. I have many of those ... um ... rewards built into my day, like Scramble. I tend to do Tetris until my eyes hurt.
You made me feel a hell of a lot better by reading that!...(all I seem to do these days is eat and sleep!) I feel like writing has left my body lit.
Aims - Glad to help:-)
DOT - don't go near the Scramble DOT or the swimming pool will never be your:-)
Julie - sadly I can never accuse anyone of nicking the Rocky Bars:-)
Debs - I'm heartened it's not just me:-)
Chrish - My pleasure. I could try to work on a Blog Blocker but my heart would not be in it. Mind you, maybe we could devise a once weekly porthole ... but then again:-)
MOB - I like that visualisation. Booker may be a little lofty but we can dream:-)
Tom Foolery - ah but the blogging goes without saying:-)
B you are very, very sensible. I could ignore the house work but the pull of Scramble is too strong:-)
The B B - I am most proud of the Dummy. Now we are both Dummy's :-)
Annie - Parkinson's Law is so true! I'm glad there's a name for it:-)
GBS - I would have to use industrial strength velcro. There is stuff now apparently which will hold radiators to the wall. Hhm Maybe still not strong enough:-)
Helenmh - Oh Helen. Non Marmiters just know what they're missing out on. It puts fire in your blood. Probably doesn't do much for concentration skills though:-)
Carol - Isn't that the case. Now you've got a lot to do so no procrastinationg ok!:-)
Dar - Hi and welcome! I don't know about 'lots'. But a bit yes:-)
Aminah - Local library is a good idea. Maybe I could sneak in some snacks with me:-)
Am looking forward to anything you post. Always love to read it. Take care m'dear:-)
Absolute - I hope the peeping is better but by reading your blog, probably too much so. Am rooting for Little Bo. x
Flowerpot - Not too hectic fp. That was a quiet day:-)
Milla - do not google it. You will be lost and not return and eaten up self imposed 'competitivenes'. Listen to me:-)
Billy - The rewards are good. Over doing them is not:-)
Motherx - you're tired m'dear. Makes everything so much more difficult. The writing will come back. It will :-)
Well, you're certainly behaving like a writer...!
Nik :)
I always procrastinate about things I really don't want to do. It's that simple.
If I wanted to do them, then I would just get on with it.
Hulla
xx
That sounds oddly familiar. I too read Scrabble until the comments. Oops.
Thanks for the laugh, Lane! (And please do invent the velcro chair.)
An interesting insight into how writers write! I had often wondered!!
Thanks for the chuckle, Lane :-))
I'm addicted to Lexulous, which keeps cutting into my writing time!
x
Having beaten me at Scramble, I've felt the need for revenge by tagging you for a meme! ;-)
loved reading this and don't worry, anything worth doing today is also worth doing tomorrow :P
I always ended finals week in college with a beautiful pedicure. You know, you're studying away and then look down at your bare feet and decide you can't go another minute without getting some polish on those nails.
Now Lane, you've given us a pretty good overview of English scoochie snacks, but I saw no mention of custard tarts. Why? Are you not a fan? And exactly what is Lionel looking for on "As Time Goes By" when he heads to the kitchen for a custard tart?
This was so, so funny! Substitute Solitaire and Freecell for Scramble and you've got my system down pat!
Hilarious. Thank you.
Nik - too much so:-)
Hulla - Very sensible:-)
Angie - I'm onto it - just after another game of Sramble:-)
Casdok - It's a bit shameful really:-)
Amanda - these games are just too addictive.
Absolute - ha! Your revenge is sweet:-)
Bart - I agree absolutely. Why rush.
Faye - I love a good custard tart. I can also see the comedy potential for a custard tart in sitcoms:-) Do they still show As Time Goes By in the US? Love Geoffry Palmer.
Wordtyst - Seems to be pretty much a writerly trait doesn't it:-)
Zinnia - I thank you :-)
How marvellous that your day is so similar to mine!!
Procrastination is the Business.
Love your blog.
LAdybird world mother - hi there and welcome! I'm glad I'm not the only one. Not by a long way it seems:-)
And thanks.
I think we can all identify with this Lane.
Brilliant!
Oh how I completely relate to this one! I think you at least got down 400 words right? I'm having tea right now instead of malted milk balls, but they are in a drawer right near my elbow. I have to get my desk out of the kitchen!
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